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Modesty of the Heart

For some reason I have been thinking about modesty a lot in recent days. And I keep coming back to having a heart of modesty above all. I looked up the definition of the word modesty and this is what I found:

mod·es·ty noun \ˈmä-də-stē\     The quality of not being too proud or confident about yourself or your abilities
 
modestyoftheheart

I keep coming back to this thought. The whole point of modesty is to not be prideful by showing off our bodies in an inappropriate way, but the very concept of modesty can lead to us being prideful about the way that we modestly dress. It is equally as wrong to dress in a way that is provocative or in way that makes us fit in, as it is to dress in a way to please people for how modestly we dress, or look down on those that don’t dress the way that you do.

C.J. Mahaney says, “Immodesty, then, is much more than wearing a short skirt or a low-cut top; it’s the act of drawing undue attention to yourself. It’s pride on display by what you wear.”

Modesty is not just a way that we dress it is an attitude of the heart that flows out into everything that we do. Dressing   in a frumpy way to draw attention to how modest you are shows just as much pride as dressing in a way to attract the attention of the men around you.

Whose adorning let it not be that outward adorning of plaiting of the hair, and of wearing of gold, or of putting on of apparel; But let it be the hidden man of the heart, in that which is not corruptible, even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price. 1 Peter 3:3-4

These verses talk about where a woman’s true beauty lies. True beauty is not about what a woman does or doesn’t wear, it is about what is in her heart and spirit.

I don’t want this to come off as though I don’t think dressing modestly is important, I do! I think we as women need to take a good look at our closets and make sure that the things that we are wearing are honoring to Christ and to our husbands (or future husbands). This probably means taking a look at how tight, low cut, and how short the things that we wear are, but most of all it means taking a look at our hearts and why we wear what we wear.  I do not think that modesty means that we have to look frumpy or that we can’t wear clothing that is trendy and in style. It just means that we need to examine what we are wearing and why we are wearing it. I think we should dress in a way that is polished and feminine. I think that we should dress in a way that represents Christ well. I think that our clothing should be an outpouring of what is in our hearts, and in our hearts should be a desire to please the Lord above all else. Above all Christ should be glorified by what we wear, not ourselves for our attractiveness, or for our “modesty”.

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Well said, Kristin! We should respect our bodies for ourselves, God and husbands/future husbands. I love being reminded of this verse and how God takes delight in us in all areas of our lives.

refiningthewildgrapes.blogspot.com

dawn

What a great topic this is and much needed in this world today. I have 3 girls and it is a tough subject for us, they see it their way and what they deal with at school. I am teaching them about this very thing and even had my daughter go out change out of the dress she was going to wear to school today. It was bought last summer and she has grown and it didn’t quite fit as loosely and covered as last year, it only last 5 minutes and I almost didn’t say anything but knew as her mom I had to. She found another dress that fit better and made it out the door just in time for the bus, double win!
I feel this way about boys too, my son is 12 and thankfully doesn’t wear his pants hanging down like the others do. Hoping he won’t go in that direction as he gets older.
This was beautifully written and is so true. I try to live and teach this everyday. Thank you for sharing it with us.

Tammy Damore

Well said and very interesting! I just saw an add, (an experiment) that Dove did this am on the subject of women and how they feel about themselves, it didn’t of course speak on modesty but it did however prove a powerful message that what we believe in our heart we project! Check it out!

Rachel Stephens

So much of what you said is what I want to teach my kids. Modesty begins in the heart. LOVE. Thanks for these great reminders!

Laura Moore

Beautifully said!

Rachel Nordgren

“True beauty is not about what a woman does or doesn’t wear, it is about what is in her heart and spirit…I think we should dress in a way that is polished and feminine.”

Amen! I think you’re so right…the heart of modesty is to make more of Christ by making less of ourselves. Love this! Thank you for sharing!

Shannon Walker

Yes! Totally agree!! Thanks for sharing! :)

Victoria Steiner Clipper

Very well written, Kristin. “Dressing in a frumpy way to draw attention to how modest you are shows just as much pride as dressing in a way to attract the attention of the men around you.” Pride sometimes manifests itself in very ‘religious’ ways. Always enjoy reading your blog.

Jennifer Brown

Yes!!!! I couldn’t agree more! Hugs!!!!

What is You Passion?

What is your passion? I checked out dictionary.com to see what the definition of passion was, and the first definition grabbed me right away. “Any powerful or compelling emotion or feeling.” The word “compelling” grabbed me right away. It is easy to say that we are passionate about something, but the proof is in what we do.

whatisyourpassion

We always feel like we don’t have enough time for certain things, but the truth is that we have time for whatever is most important to us. “I don’t have time” and “I am too busy” are really just the excuses that we tell people and even ourselves when we don’t want to do something, or it just isn’t on our priority list. I am in no way saying that you need to start saying yes to everything you are asked to do. I am actually kind of saying the opposite. We have to actively say yes to the things that are really important to us, and we also have to actively say no to the things that aren’t.

So in practicality what does this look like? For me it means…

Saying yes to studying Scripture, and no to mindlessly scrolling Facebook.
Saying yes to reading life changing books, and no to novels. (Novels aren’t bad, they would just suck too much of my time)
Saying yes to quiet nights at home, and no to too many activities.
Saying yes to simplicity, and no to clutter.
Saying yes to playing with Stella, and no to too much tv time for her.
Saying yes to encouraging women to love Scripture through social media, and no to using social media to fuel discontentment.

I could keep going, but I think you get the picture. I am not perfect at that list…not even close, but thinking through what we are really passionate about and what is just sucking our time helps identify what we need to change.

So what are you passionate about? And what are you going to say no to in order to make it happen? Leave a comment below and let me know!

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rachelle

I love this. I love the practical steps. We so need to see things in black and white sometimes! Say yes to this, no to that…Thanks for sharing :)

Caitie Sheppard

You. are. amazing. I love you…going to make my list now! :)

Jessica Schugardt

Fitness…photography and teaching. Thank you for sharing this. Its always a great reminder to stop making my excuses and make time for what I love. ❤❤

Ami Adams

I am passionate about reading and writing, and encouraging young girls who are struggling with who they are and being godly young women. But I don’t spend as much time writing as I should or could. I tell myself that other things are more important instead of saying no and taking some time for me.

Rachel Nordgren

Yes, yes, yes!! This is so good and so full of truth, Kristin! Simplifying our concerns enables us to amplify the passions that God has given us, and the things that are important to us. I definitely agree – saying no to what doesn’t matter enables us to say yes to the things that do. Like studying Scripture and not being overwhelmed with activities!

I recently wrote a blog series about Simplifying that you might find interesting – http://ouryellowdoor.wordpress.com/2014/03/15/the-simplified-series-intro/

Thank you for sharing your heart, Kristin!

dawn

I love this word and actually feel this way about so much now that I’m older. Once I turned 40 I just dived into the art journaling world and sharing happy mail and inspiring others and making time for me and what I love. My passion after God/family/friends is my Project Life and then all my art stuff. I’m trying to do more reading this year and writing and my camera is always with me. I’m so lucky to have many passions and later on hope to add some knitting, sewing, quilting to the list.
Thank you for sharing this wonderful post. I loved your list and am so happy you make time for what really makes you happy. That is hard to do and especially with a little one. Oh and being a early bird helps me to have that quiet time to do these things. So if it matters to you then you have to squeeze it in somewhere.

Kelly A. Kantola

I’m passionate about watching my son play sports, raising him to be a good citizen, teaching him to be a good student. Studying Scripture….less scrolling the internet, including Facebook :/. Decluttering, Letting Go of things I no longer use.

Two Months

How has it been two months? Two months since I held my sweet baby girl in my arms. Yesterday was two months since I last felt her sweet kicks, and since she met Jesus, and tomorrow it will be two months since I delivered her and held her precious and perfectly formed body in my arms. It is important to me that I am honest about this journey, and I never want to give the wrong impression. I want to be real.

The reality is…

Yesterday while Stella napped I stood in the nursery and wept. I held Sophia’s blanket, and couldn’t make the tears stop. I wanted to hold her. Last week I had a day that was one of the first days that I hadn’t cried, and then I cried with guilt for not crying. I am learning that grief doesn’t always make sense, and that it comes in waves that wash over you and almost knock you down. I miss her. I miss her thick black hair, and her long slender feet. I miss what would have been, I long to see her first smiles, and to see her discover the world.

but then…

I remember that she is discovering Heaven. She is smiling as she worships our Savior. I am reminded that there is coming a day when Jesus will wipe away every tear, and we will worship Him together. I remember that He is holding her, and He is holding me too. When I am so weak, and I want my little girl, He gives me strength. When the tears keep coming, and I don’t even know what to pray I can just say His name, and know that He understands.

My daughter is gone, and He is good, and in my heart I know that there is no contradiction in that sentence.

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Lori

I’m right there with you, and two months has seemed like an eternity. Thank you for your openness through your journey. Our little angels are a day apart and I hope they are friends in heaven by now. Hugs.

Emily Lockard Furry

I love you. I’m praying for you every. single. day.

Suzan Severn

I know. We know. We ache with you. We cry with you. And we trust God and the truth of His word with you. It is enough….

Caitie Sheppard

I love you so much…praying for you both!!!

Melissa Siena

I know you don’t feel amazing, but you are. Thank you for sharing your heart. I met with a counselor yesterday, and she reminded me that praising God in a storm, doesn’t mean praising Him FOR The storm! SO glad for that!! I love you girl. so much. I hate that we are linked in such profound losses

Ami Adams

You are so strong and courageous and brave, yet I imagine that you don’t feel that way too much right now. Thank you so much for being vulnerable and real. You are a living example of God being great and mighty even in the midst of our pain.

Amy Kendig

May Jesus cover you in His perfect peace.

Amy Kendig

May Jesus cover you with His perfect peace.

March 2014 Favorites

One of my favorite things to do is to watch beauty YouTube videos, and I particularly enjoy monthly favorites videos, because when you read a blog or watch a YouTube channel you start to feel like you know these girls and like to hear what they are loving. So I thought I would do a monthly favorites series. I will include some beauty favorites, as well as some other favorite things from the month.

Revlon Just Bitten Kissable Balm Stains and Matte Balms: I first discovered these right before Christmas and have been building up a collection because they last forever and have gorgeous color. Sadly to say my Mom’s collection is bigger because once I told her to try them she pretty much bought every shade..they are that good.

It Cosmetics Naturally Pretty Palette: My Mom bought this for me for Christmas and I have been in love with it. It is a whole eyeshadow pallet of matte shades. It has a great mix of neutral shades and you can create so many different looks with it.

Velcro Hair Bow: My sister bought me a set of these velcro hair bows a few years ago. They are made to keep your bangs out of your face when you do your makeup, and I use them everyday. Jeremy says they make me look like Minnie Mouse.

eos Sweet Mint Organic Lip Balm : I just tried this lip balm and I now see what all the rage is about. So moisturizing, and I am obsessed with mint and teal so this is just kind of perfect.

Mary Kay Indulge Soothing Eye Gel: You know that awful puffiness you get around your eyes from crying? This helps combat that. It is cool and makes my eyes feel better. It isn’t an eye cream so I don’t use it every day, just when I feel puffiness.

Babyliss Pro Nano Titanium Curling Iron: I always just thought that my hair didn’t hold curl, until I got this curling iron. Who knew I just needed a professional curling iron! My curls stay all day when I use it even without putting product in other than hairspray.

Healthy Sexy Hair Leave in Conditioner: I have tangly hair. When I get out of the shower it is always knotty, and always pulls when I comb it out. I got this leave in conditioner in an ipsy bag and I fell in love with it and will definitely be buying the full size. It lets my comb glide right through my hair without pulling.

essie Nail Color in Cute as a Button: I love coral pinks so I fell in love with this color when I saw it at Target, and thought it just screamed Spring.

Listening too:This sermon by Matt Chandler, such an encouragement for anyone facing something they don’t understand.  And the song “I Am Not Alone” by Kari Jobe.

Reading: Christ in the Chaos: How the Gospel Changes MotherhoodChrist in The Chaos| How The Gospel Transforms Motherhood, and the book of Colossians.

What are you loving this month? I would love to hear your recomendations.

*some links may contain affiliate links

 

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I love Eos lip balm and cute as a button from Essie (such a pretty color)!! Haven’t tried the Revlon Balms, but the one you have picture there sure is pretty – may have to give it a try!! I absolutely love these types of posts (and videos) too! : )

Maegan R .

I love your posts! You have such a sweet and godly spirit and you capture the beauty of life through words and pictures. Thank you for sharing. I thought I would share my favorite song of the week. It’s called His Cross. I’ll try to attach a link. http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=PtDAL5rn-Ks. Last night I wept as I folded laundry an listened I this song. How powerful the death and resurrection of Christ that we may one day live with Him!

Wendy Van Der Meersche

Love all your favorites! Where did you get the darling makeup bag? :)

Welcome to the New Blog!

If you have been following for awhile you may notice that things are looking a bit different around here. Along with a little blog facelift, this site is taking on a bit of a different focus. Though it used to be mainly a place for Jeremy and I to post the weddings that we photographed, the purpose has shifted in recent months to more of a place for me to write. I started blogging more about my time in Scripture, being a Mama, and living an intentional and simplified life. So we made the decision to make a bit of a shift. We will still be shooting weddings and posting them on our Facebook page, but this blog will be a place for me to write about life and what God is teaching me. I am so exited about this new blog and about what God is doing.

I have some other exciting things in the works, so be sure to follow along on instagram to see sneak peeks of some exciting new things that will be happening soon!

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The new look is gorgeous! It has been so encouraging following your posts on Instagram, and I am thrilled to now follow along here. The Lord is using you and the story of your beautiful family in powerful ways! Thank you for being so vulnerable and bold in your faith. Blessings, dear!

Margo Hein Stewart

Beautiful!

Daniel Devine

Your new layout looks very nice–well done :)